Dremt my sister died

very sad.  woke crying……

she isn’t dead but she is addicted to prescription meds.  we, me and the family,are gona try to talk to her about it this month.  a rough thing, shes so stubborn,alone,depressed,and all that goes with addiction.

when I dream of death and wake from the dream crying ………a lot of time it happens.  I hate typing those words.


The missing girl I channeled 3 years ago they declared dead.  no body.  They won’t give any info cuz they are still trying to find her killer.  i didn’t see him.  she showed me where to look for evidence.  i never gave it to the authorities yet.  i have to to clear my soul.  soon.











the dream was: me and my daughter of 17 trapped in a house full of men.bad men that w anted to rape us…naked men all over that locked the doors….i woke up and said thtas  not good did it happen…no im home with my daughter and we aren’t in that place……..so hard to tell the reality from the 4th world…


Last Dream is all good Mom said

I asked her  although  i thought i should not because my dad just died,,,,,she said she decided to take the monkey pets without my dads knowing or me or my brother or my s sister and give them to the zoo….I know she was mad at my father.. heartbroken by my fathers cheating and drunk with the neighbor…….they just did it….took my monkey family and gave it away……..

My BooBoo

Dremt about my squirrl monkey I ahd as akid . My dead father was in it giving me back my monkey they gave away on me.  They never told me they were gona do it.  I woke up so tiered and felt like I’d really have the chance to have him in his last days of life. Obveously I don’t know if he is still alive, most likely no…I don’t know how long they  live….shit it was 35 yers ago!!

I’m very stressed these days with a new class to teach and plenty of work load but its temporary and god thing cuz i find i dream alot more when i’m stressed.  ironic though as i need more sleep i get more desturbance in it.  maybe cuz my brain has a tough time turning off?

the good thing is their doesn’t seem to be as much grusomnesss and deathas their used to be.  i wish i couldb log more but im too busy right now. i’m too tieresd too.

No time

I h ave to break from posting….got a new job that’s killing me till April.

I continue to have the dreams..that never stops.

I’ll post if some thing is screaming at me to post but it has been redundant non important information about me thus far.

If i had the time to decipher it I would but I’m bombarded by work right now till end of may…I should be thankful because I need the $ but it is way to much work for the $ I’m getting paid.  why do it?  It might lead to better stuff at the college I want to do…..Teaching basic computer course vs. teaching in the digital technologies and culture degree…… hey that’s my bag…..of course you would have to know what courses are involved.  I can’t tel u and still stay anonymous

……For now I need to be anonymous…maybe some day i can be who i am on the internet and in real me.  I look forward to that day.

bloody childeren

on the play ground 2 or 4 white  3ird gradeewrs girls and then 3-5 black makes thirid graders..and the vissine on the possiblew bad guy….i’ll scanthenpic tomoprrow,,,,,yuicky stuff at 5 am…….lotsda blod….and kids…….please not true…let it notn be  reality here now,,,i vcan’t tell the diffferencce betwwen whi ti isan a what is the the not reALITYT…/WHAYT HRE FUCK IOS RE;ity?????????